the edge… there is no honest way to explain it because the only people who really know where it is are the ones who have gone over. ~ hunter s. thompson

among the many traits my father and i share, chronic compulsive furniture rearranging is one of them. i find it hugely satisfying. in taking after his footsteps, truly and throughly drive my mom, brothers and sisters insane. and it thrills the socks off me.

it is an art though, like my father, i acquire the greatest pleasure from alone. and should i require any assistance at all in carrying or lifting, i expect it be given freely, quickly and cleanly – which is in reality,received in the exact opposite form. very much, i assure you, of which escapes my understanding. in this particular issue, i confess to be an utterly repulsive perfectionist.

what goes through my head? everything. nothing. just about anything. a vision, if i may. of something simple. or something madly grand. of something functional. and purely and intentionally aesthetic. exactly that. but not quite that. but surely, all of that.

tonight, i acquired a lovely wooden cabinet for my room. a wonderful relief, i must say, for my lovingly overflowing bookshelf which, i have a sneaking feeling is missing several volumes dispersed over the peninsular of this country. kalau ada siapa2 yang terasa pedas tu, please return the cili.

i am only thankful that this compulsion only comes about as sparingly as possible. all other times, i must caution visitors as to my personal definition of ‘messy artistic’ where my personal space is concerned.